Boys you cant have it all

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Boys you cant have it all

So today as I’m on my way to work I was listening to an interview on  hip pop station. Their celebrity guest was the ex-boyfriend of Nikki Minaj, they were together for about 10 years. They started both started from the bottom and made their way to fame, her from her raps and him for being her hype man/man behind the scene/boyfriend/everything.  For reason I don’t really care but the rest of the world does they split up and have been at each others throat since, feuds on social media and all possible places. Now I’m the first to say that people shouldn’t get in between couple fights because no one is there when the two of them are alone behind closed doors, no one really knows what goes on in there. So as the interview went on one of the DJs tell Safaree that he should feel betrayed that right when she started to blow up she broke up with him. Now this is where I got a little uncomfortable. The person riding the car with me tells me how fucked up this chick is for leaving a man who has been by her side since day one. My response was “Men want a women that’s nasty (in the sexual sense), a women that doesn’t care to show off her body, a women who will make you aroused just by a few lines she spits at you, a women who is a women but thinks and acts like an absolute man. But why do men get mad when the same woman pulls a move a man would? Men do it all the time, I’ve seen it in sports they marry their high school sweetheart then get famous and dump them for a video vixen.”

Boys you cant have it all!! And don’t get mad when you get what you deserve.

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Fresh 29

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fresh 29Just last week I turned 29, when I was younger I considered 30 very old age…now not so much. I’ve been feeling a bit down because at this age I figured I have all my shit together. That Id have a gorgeous house with a white picket fence, the perfect marriage and children… a cute little family, enough money saved up for a rainy day, a walk in closet with everything I could ask for, a cool job that I enjoy and paid close to 3 figures a year, a brand new car. So far the only thing I have are the kids LOL. I made a lot of stupid decisions that just made my goals take longer to achieve but if years brought me anything I could say it made me more realistic, I no longer want these things. I just want my own place not a perfect one but a place a could call my own, I don’t want the perfect marriage I just want someone to make me feel like I’m the best thing that ever happened in their life someone who will respect me and be loyal, a perfect marriage isn’t real. A job that I feel comfortable in and pays ok, and a car that will last me long enough so when I’m old I still have one. I want health and happiness. That simple! So even though I don’t have what  I thought I would I’m on the right path to have the more realistic thing I now know I want.

HNY

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I’m only like 9 days late!!! but yes Happy New Year!!! Made it through the first week of the year, couple of crazy days but made it none the less. Don’t worry I wont post a full blog about New year new me bull crap because I’m a big believer that you don’t need a new year to make better choices, try new things, leave old habits behind or tweak yourself a bit, I believe this is a year round thing. I’m constantly looking for way to become a better me.

I was off for two weeks with my girls and Monday was my first day back at work. As we had our daily huddle and catching up he showed us this song, the song itself is a bit stupid but the message is where it’s at. He says they played it when he graduated in 99 (I was 13), people past their mid twenties understand that but a younger person wont, and I know because I showed it to my 13-year-old daughter and she was like this song is stupid and listen but didn’t really pay attention. So maybe it will help you now or prepare you for the future or simply say should have.

Second born

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Featured imageAs my youngest is growing, which almost feels like at the speed of light, I’ve realized that I haven’t been as good as a mom to her as I was with my first-born. I was 15 when I had my first kid, when she was 2 I started working a part-time and went to school but the first two years of her existence my only focus was school, house duties and her. I had more time to spend with her, I took pictures, too many videos,played with her A LOT, and took more time to try to teach her things. With my second I was already working a full-time job and finishing up a Technical school by the time my second one was 6 months her father and I had split up and I suddenly found myself juggling a household, a 5-year-old that was miserable because she saw so much fighting, a toddler, work and being a stupid teenager. It makes me sad because I know I could have done better with her. I look back and I can definitely say I raised  them differently. I’m trying to be the parent i should have been. In the past two years I feel like I’ve tried so hard I suffocate her at times.Honestly at times I feel like I’m trying to over compensate for the lack of parenting when she was a itty bitty baby that I’m making her too dependent on me. I read a lot of articles and in one of my reads I found an article that nailed to the tee how I felt about raising my second born. This article just summed up everything I felt. I cant even lie, by the time I was done reading I was crying.

Been a while

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Its been over 6 months since I wrote an entry on my blog, so much has happened; good and bad.So I have tons of material. The site has changed a whole lot. IT LOOKS GREAT!!I need to play with it a little bit to get familiarized. Hope all my followers and fellow bloggers are doing good! I’ll be posting my official entry manana, for now HAPPY MONDAY!!!

Its been a while

20 lessons

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20 lessonsI come to realize that life is like a very long lesson, sometimes you think you have it all figured out and bam!!!! something happens and your world gets turned upside down only to make you realize that you didn’t and from that a new lesson in life arises. Here are the top 20 I’ve learned in the past two years.

  1. Some people are very vicious even after you’ve open your heart and home for them.
  2. Never expect people to do as you have because you’ll end up being hurt.
  3. Don’t do favors if you expect a return out of it. Do it from the heart.
  4. Children remember and notice everything.
  5. Never jump into a relationship after just ending one, time for yourself is important.
  6. Take your health seriously.
  7. Never stop learning things, always ask why, never settle for a whatever answer.
  8. Do things that make you smile (I know it’s a bit of a cliche but you wont regret it)
  9. Be honest with everything, even the small stuff.
  10. Don’t neglect your friends. You’ll need them one day.
  11. Don’t trust people who gossip about their own close friends.
  12. Positivity is important, it will change your outcome in everything you do in life.
  13. Love hard or go home.
  14. Envy comes with success, prepare yourself by learning to ignore what people say about you.
  15. Low life women will try to ruin the relationship you have with your better half, build a relationship so airtight that no one is able to break you up.
  16. You mom is right about 88% of the time.
  17. Don’t be afraid to express yourself you might regret not doing so later.
  18. Learn to put your pride aside.
  19. When things are bad remember it could be worst.
  20. Nothing is forever.

20 Lessonss

How I met…..

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HOW I MET....My latest obsession is how I met your mother. I kinda hate myself for not picking it up sooner but I must say that I’m completely obsessed, Ive blown through 3 seasons in 1 month. Of course I’m still proceeding with my life as normal but every free time I get I see an episode.  I love it because its super funny with hints of real shit and a dash of pure crazy shit only I would think of. From all of them I can say I love Marshal and Lily the most. I want a relationship like theirs. Right around season 2 I started to wonder what it would be like if I had a show of my own with my girlfriends. Would the show be any good?? Pfff of course it would. Cause I’m Awesommmme (in my best barney impression)  So stay tuned guys who know maybe one day I’ll get a reality show.

I do’s

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I dosOn Sunday I attended a wedding for the co-worker of the guy I’m dating. I made sure I looked good as all his co-workers were going to be there and some I was meeting for the very first time. I am extremely proud to say that I was able to look hot ass hell for under $90.00. I felt like a million bucks and my partner and i look like super stars next to each other.

Me

The church was beautiful, it was spacious but the priest performed a horrible service. It was so cute to hear them say their I do’s. The banquet hall was very spacious and decorated nicely, her colors were silver and purple. I usually cry throughout the whole wedding but I surprised my date as well as myself when my eyes only got teary one time during a dance the groom had with his mother. We danced and had so much fun joking around with everyone. As the night progress and I saw how happy the newlyweds were I started to think of my own wedding and how happy I was that day. I went over the budget we had set and still had to cut a few things out but I was and still am satisfied with my wedding. I got everything I wanted and I felt so blessed. Sometimes I say I’ll never get married again but I kind of want to do it again. I want to dress up in a beautiful gown look my groom in the eye and say all the beautiful things possible and him to me in front of all the people that we truly care about.

Fri 13th with a side of full moon

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Fri 13th with a side of full moonSo its Friday the 13th, so for those who are superstitious lets not do any of the things that can mess our day up. Many people anticipate this day some have a fear of this day. But today is a very special Friday the 13th, today we have a very rare combo, we have a full moon as well, this hasn’t happened in June since 1919, last time the combo was on a Friday the 13 was back in October 2000. The next one wont happen till Oct. 13, 2049. This delightful combo is known as both the ‘Strawberry” moon and “Honey” moon, the actual full moon will occur very early Friday morning, but will still be full when it rises in the east Friday evening.

Wonder if they know

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wonder if they knowI not sure if any other mothers feel the same way I do or I’m the only weird one but I feel a little uncomfortable that my kids know that I have sex. I know it’s a stupid because duh I have sex how else would they be here, but I’m always very cautious or make sure there are not traces at all that I just finished having intercourse. My youngest is 8 so I know she really has no clue but my other one is 13 and she already took the sex classes everyone takes in 7th or 8th grade so I know she knows whats up. Sometimes I know they hear us because we tend to get loud but I make sure i don’t come out of the room if they are outside or try not to act suspicious. Does anyone else feel this way?? How do you get past this??